You know, I’ve got to tell you, that Regent-Lord Ponytail is a real piece of work. First he bitches and moans because I assumed his people could handle themselves, then he tries to refuse extra help, only to have it turn out that he damn well needed it in the first place. “Why are you crying, Lor’thewhoever?” “Because it’s raining!” “Why were you crying yesterday?” “Because it wasn’t!” I swear I’d be half tempted to compare the high-maintenance fucker to Garona, except I’d give even odds Garona has a bigger dick.

YES I SAID IT. SOMEBODY had to say it.

Anyway. After we finished up at Tian Monastery, I flew up to Kun-Lai summit to see what ol’ Eyepatch and his Reliquary peeps managed to find. Turns out, they found a big gang of mogu running all over an area called the Valley of Emperors. Now, credit where it’s due – this time, rather than getting slapped around and then crying about it like a little girl, Eyepatch recruited some extra muscle from back at Domination Point to tag along and protect him. Like a little girl. So, you know, at least dude is being more proactive about his little girling. That’s something, I guess.

Anyhow, by the time I got up there, Ponytail had already collected some kind of sealed crate from the mogu, along with documents indicating the mogu were mobilizing now that some ancient ruler of theirs – the “Thunder King,” I think – has been resurrected. Because, as I might have mentioned once or twice before, nobody ever stays fucking DEAD anymore.

Ponytail had sent his hired help into one of the nearby tombs to try to track down the leader of this particular batch of mogu, which was fine, but when I told him I wanted to go in and check for myself, he just started protesting and arguing. Because his people were perfectly capable of handling things on their own, and why don’t we just wait here until they get back, because wind chill factor just adds to the ambience here on this snowy mountainside don’t you think? So I finally got sick of him stalling, and explained that I was going into the tomb whether he liked it or not. This explanation took the form of me clocking him one. I’m fairly sure – but not 100% — that he didn’t lose any teeth.

So I went on down to the tomb, and boy was it a good thing that I did. The valley around the tomb was pretty much overrun by mogu. Which meant, first of all, that Ponytail’s people would have had a hell of a time getting back OUT once they were finished – and second of all, bonus exercise for yours truly. Granted, it was BRIEF exercise, but it felt good to break out Gorehowl and clear a path for myself while dropping a mogu or two. Or three. Or 37. Really, the mogu should probably still count themselves lucky – I would have killed even more of them, but I think I forgot to carry the 1.

By the time I fought my way into the tomb, Eyepatch’s hired help had engaged the mogu leader…and were getting their asses handed to them. Luckily I showed up before they got completely flattened, and gave a good thorough beatdown to the mogu head honcho. BOY IT SURE IS A GOOD THING I WAITED WITH PONYTAIL AND DIDN’T INTERFERE DOWN THERE HUH GUYS. I tried to get the mogu to cough up some information on that Divine Bell relic, but he wasn’t having it. I was about to give him a nice lethal demonstration of my default penalty for being uncooperative, when one of the blood elf magisters ported him back to the base camp and yammered out this whole deal about giving his people a chance to get the information we want out of the prisoner. So, whatever. They want to take a crack at it, fine, even though I can’t see much that these elves are going to do to change the mogu’s attitude, unless he needs his highlights touched up or some shit.

At that point there wasn’t much else for me to do other than follow my handy-dandy trail of mogu corpses back out.

Pimp away.

Pimp away.

So after I pimped my way back to Mortimer, I left word for Lor’thewhatever to get his people working on the prisoner AND that sealed box they found, and headed on back to the Sanctum of Two Moons. I’ve got a couple things I want to check on while the elves get started. I’ll update again once I’ve had a chance to follow up on a couple leads.