Tag Archives: faranell
Meanwhile, outside…
* Faranell locked himself into a closed time loop at the end of the Anti-Plague of Southshore storyline (and explained what he’d done to Garrosh here), which set off the events of the subsequent Timequake arc. He also discussed his experience of the loop with Garrosh and Liadrin last time.
A problem like Shayari
So, Faranell was still working on his tests when I went to see him. I figured I’d leave him alone so he could concentrate on his work rather than, you know, concentrate on making smartass comments. Anyway.
In the meantime, I’ve been trying to finish up these meetings. I had a conference earlier today with Overseer Elaglo about his new duties “helping” Eitrigg with things. Eitrigg didn’t sound too thrilled about the new arrangements, but it’s not like he’s got much to say in the matter. Didn’t stop him from saying a few things on his way out, though. Anyhow, we also had Xorenth in to go over the details of another project I’ve got him and Elaglo collaborating on. Taktani sat in on the meeting – she managed to keep herself mostly reined in, by some miracle – but for the time being I’m going to hold off on posting those transcripts. Most of them, anyway. Some of the operations we were going over are fairly sensitive, so I don’t think I want to go announcing them on the blog.
As opposed to all the other highly sensitive, top secret stuff I casually write about here on practically a daily basis, right? Like, oh, I don’t know, evidently being the surprise dad of a half-draenei teenager, for instance. Pending confirmation, anyway. Oh well. It’s all among friends here, I guess. Anyway.
Speaking of the pending confirmation, though…over to the de-classified part of Tak’s handiwork…
(How about here, Mr. Warchief? Oh good! Now it’s okay to start copying the meeting. I like this part better anyway, there’s not as much talking about the angry fire cave. I don’t think I would like it there. It sounds scary! Oh okay, I guess I’m taking too long to get to the meeting.
I guess I’ll start with the part where Mr. Malkorok came in. Don’t worry, though, he doesn’t stay long!)
MALKOROK – Warchief, you have visitors waiting outside. The elf and the undead want to see you.
GARROSH – Ah. They’re a little early, but whatever. Let them in.
MALKOROK – Yes sir.
(Mr. Malkorok stepped outside, then came back in with Ms. Liadrin and Dr. Zombie.)
LIADRIN – Good morning, Warchief. I hope we’re not interrupting.
GARROSH – It’s fine. We’re close to done here. In fact, I think you guys are set with your orders.
ELAGLO – Yes, sir. I still need to check with the excavation crew.
XORENTH – And I’m fairly sure Kardris and Koranathal wanted to see me about something.
GARROSH – I’ll let you get to it, then. I’ll check in with you later.
(Mr. Elaglo and Mr. Xorenth got up and started to head toward the door.)
LIADRIN – I hope we’re not rushing you gentlemen off. I don’t believe we’ve met, actually. (extending her hand) I’m Lady Liadrin, of the Blood Knights of Silvermoon.
ELAGLO – So you are.
(Mr. Elaglo and Mr. Xorenth kept walking to the door and left. That didn’t seem very nice!)
LIADRIN – Well then.
(Mr. Warchief watched Mr. Elaglo and Mr. Xorenth, then kept watching the door for a minute before turning back to Ms. Liadrin.)
GARROSH – Okay. So, do we have news?
LIADRIN – Dr. Faranell has finished his tests, yes sir.
GARROSH – And?
FARANELL – Congratulations. It’s a girl. (holding out a cigar) Here, have a cigar.
(Mr. Warchief looked at Dr. Zombie kind of funny, then went back to talking. I guess Mr. Warchief doesn’t smoke. That’s good!)
GARROSH – You’re sure?
FARANELL – The results were pretty clear-cut. (shrugs) You’re sure you don’t want the cigar? Seems a shame to waste it, on top of all that perfectly good ichor from the test.
LIADRIN – I must admit, sir, I can’t say I’m terribly surprised.
GARROSH – You kind of had that vibe from Shayari from the start, huh?
LIADRIN – After a fashion, sir.
FARANELL – Good call. Cigar?
LIADRIN – (sighing) No, Doctor.
GARROSH – So that’s that… She’s settled in okay?
LIADRIN – More or less, sir. Though now I suppose we’re left with a few more questions to address about her situation.
GARROSH – Yeah.
LIADRIN – No doubt you’ll have security matters for you and…the overlord to consider.
GARROSH – For the time being, I want to stay pretty selective about who knows…well, who she really is.
LIADRIN – Fairly prudent, I suppose, sir. For now, at least. I would imagine there will be more than a few questions raised as she’s seen around Orgrimmar, of course.
GARROSH – I can deal with those. The questions… (nodding to Malkorok) …and anyone who starts getting too nosy.
MALKOROK – I have ears in many corners of the city, Warchief. I’ll be sure to find out if anyone is…unduly curious.
GARROSH – Good.
FARANELL – Good indeed. Here, have a cigar.
(Mr. Malkorok glared at Dr. Zombie and grumbled a little.)
FARANELL – Cigar? No? No one?
GARROSH – Will you knock if off with the damn cigar!
MALKOROK – If you’ll…excuse me, Warchief, I’ll be outside…
(Mr. Malkorok grumbled a little more and left. Yay!)
FARANELL – Oh well, fine. More for me, then.
TAKTANI – You really shouldn’t smoke, Dr. Zombie! It’s bad for you!
FARANELL – Hello? Already-dead guy.
GARROSH – Tak, just stick to copying down the conversation, not joining it.
(I was just trying to help! =( )
LIADRIN – If I might make a further suggestion, sir, I’ve been considering the matter of Shayari’s ongoing education. As you may recall, she was studying to be a mage in Dalaran when the purge took place.
GARROSH – Huh. Well, we have trainers here, and I could probably have Ureda get her in with the newest shadowmages, but to tell you the truth, I don’t know if I want her hanging around too much down in the Cleft of Shadow.
LIADRIN – It is, I’ve heard, something of an unsavory area, sir.
GARROSH – Among other things. So anyway, you had an idea?
LIADRIN – Yes, sir. I thought it might be preferable to entrust her training to someone more familiar to us. I’ve spoken to Dr. Faranell about the matter, and he’s expressed his willingness to take Shayari on as an apprentice.
FARANELL – You left out the part about my extortionate fee.
GARROSH – Huh. Are you sure you’d be up for a job like that, Doc? I mean, no offense, but you never really struck me as a particularly powerful mage.
FARANELL – I’m not, really. I’m not bad, mind you, but I’m nothing special. Still, for training purposes, especially for the early stage Shayari’s at, high-end power isn’t nearly as important as a good knowledge base.
LIADRIN – Which is an area in which we’re actually…particularly fortunate to have a resource as rare as the good doctor.
FARANELL – Fortunate for the rest of you, anyway.
GARROSH – Uh, why’s that? I mean I know you’re a smart guy and all, Doc, but what’s so rare about him?
LIADRIN – Well, Warchief, as you might recall, Dr. Faranell was blessed with an eidetic memory.
FARANELL – Oh yes. Blessed.
LIADRIN – As such, he has a near-perfect retention of virtually every magic sourcebook he’s read. And that particular capacity was… well… augmented by one of the peculiarities of Dr. Faranell’s personal history.
FARANELL – Is that what we’re calling it now? A peculiarity?
LIADRIN – There aren’t many terms that lend themselves readily.
GARROSH – Are you two going to finish explaining this, or do I have to start guessing what the hell you’re talking about?
FARANELL – The time loop.
GARROSH – I… Oh.
LIADRIN – Yes sir. I’m sure I needn’t remind you of the closed temporal loop Dr. Faranell sealed himself in last year.
GARROSH – Yeah, oddly enough, I remember, even without the doc’s super-memory. It was kind of a big deal.
LIADRIN – Indeed, sir. As it happens…well, Doctor, I imagine you can explain better than I could.
FARANELL – Yeah, so. You know that while I was in the time loop, I kept reliving the same 11-year period over and over. Only the thing is, each time around, I experienced that repetition individually. So if I went around five times, it wasn’t like I experienced it once and it kept repeating without my knowing – I was aware of each time through, and knew, okay, this is pass #5.
GARROSH – Yeah, I remember that part. And you ended up going around…crap, how many times was it?
FARANELL – 2,734. I was in the middle of number 2,735 when I got snapped out of it again.
GARROSH – Holy shit.
FARANELL – Holy shit indeed. Anyway, though, the point of all this is that every cycle through, I had to repeat all the things I’d originally done in that timeline, obviously, so as not to disrupt history—
GARROSH – Well, other than how you DID disrupt history, and, y’know, almost destroyed the world in the process.
FARANELL – Yes, there’s that, but nobody’s perfect. Even me. One thing that I realized fairly early on, though, was that even though I had to preserve all the things I was supposed to do in those years, there was also an awful lot of down time when it really didn’t matter what I was doing. Nights when I was alone by myself at home, for instance – it really didn’t matter if I spent the time, say, doing a crossword puzzle or playing solitaire, since it would literally affect no one other than me.
GARROSH – Dude, seriously? Crossword puzzles and solitaire? Please tell me that’s not what you really spent your nights doing.
FARANELL – No, but I didn’t think “designing more virulent strains of plague” rolled off the tongue as well. Shall we continue, or are you not yet finished noting how lame I was for not making varsity?
GARROSH – Yeah, fine, whatever.
FARANELL – At any rate… Well, let me put it this way. Have you ever thought, “Boy, there are all these books I’d like to read, if only I had the time to get around to them”?
(I think Mr. Warchief might have thought Dr. Zombie wasn’t finished yet, because he didn’t say anything. He just stood there looking at him for a minute. I hope Mr. Warchief’s ears are okay!)
FARANELL – Okay, silly question on my part. But you can grasp the concept of that, right?
GARROSH – Yeah, sure. World enough and time. Got it.
FARANELL – Well… Thanks to my…circumstances… I had over 30,000 years to get around to them.
GARROSH – Holy… Hang on. How many books did you end up “getting around to”?
FARANELL – Pretty much all of them.
LIADRIN – And again, sir, it bears noting: he made his way, in essence, through the entire repository of written knowledge…with a photographic memory.
GARROSH – (letting out a long, low whistle) Whew. So, yeah, you’re definitely the man for the job here, Doc. And hey, I guess this means you get to be a professor like your brother, huh?
FARANELL – Yes, well, hopefully not too much like him. He sort of jumped the rails there at the end.
GARROSH – Huh. Yeah. Actually, though, this works out pretty perfectly. Shayari can move on over to the Undercity, she can be a little more low-profile there, you can teach her the ins and outs of all that magic crap, everybody wins.
LIADRIN – Well, sir, I hadn’t really meant that Shay should—
GARROSH – We might as well get the ball rolling right away on this, in fact. MALKOROK!
(Mr. Malkorok leaned back in through the door.)
MALKOROK – Yes, sir?
GARROSH – Malk, Shayari is going to be going back to the Undercity with the doc here. I want you to go with him now and help make any arrangements he needs. Transport, storage, whatever he needs. You clear?
MALKOROK – (giving Faranell a disdainful glance) If you wish, Warchief.
LIADRIN – Warchief, might I suggest before we go ahead with this—
GARROSH – No sense wasting time when we’ve got a winner of a plan, Liadrin. Hop to it, Doc. Malkorok will make sure you get whatever you need.
(Mr. Malkorok stood in the doorway and looked to Dr. Zombie while gesturing out the door. He almost looked polite! I wonder why he looked like something hurt…)
MALKOROK – If you’ll…come this way…undead.
FARANELL – (walking to the door) Oh good. I was afraid my day couldn’t become any more delightful.
(Mr. Malkorok and Dr. Zombie left.)
GARROSH – Gotta hand it to you, Liadrin, that was a pretty clutch idea about the doc.
LIADRIN – Well…thank you, sir. Although I can’t say I’d expected you to want Shayari altogether relocated to the Undercity…
GARROSH – Hey, kids her age go away to school all the time.
LIADRIN – That’s true, sir, but most of them are coming from a home that’s fairly stable to begin with. Shayari, on the other hand, has already been uprooted once from a place she’d considered home.
GARROSH – She should be fine with Edwin looking after her. Plus she can always zip up to Brill if she needs some fresh air. Or fresher air. Or, well, somewhat-less-noxious air.
LIADRIN – Yes, sir. Although… If I might ask you something, sir? I don’t mean to intrude into your personal matters…
GARROSH – I think that train left the station when you showed up with a surprise daughter for me.
LIADRIN – Well, sir… Have you gone to see her at all, since the other day?
GARROSH – No. I haven’t. I’ve been busy enough trying to take care of business and tie up all the loose ends that have been coming loose since…I… haven’t been around to un-loose them…
LIADRIN – I understand that you’re a busy man, of course, Warchief. At the same time…she is your daughter.
GARROSH – I’m aware, yeah.
LIADRIN – Don’t you think you should?
GARROSH – When I get a chance to, Liadrin. Worst case scenario, I’ll be sure to see her off before she takes off with Edwin, and…
LIADRIN – I understand that this has been a lot to be added to an already full plate, sir. I’d like to reassure you, though, if you feel it would be helpful to have a sympathetic ear as a new parent — a sounding board, as it were — I would be more than happy to—
GARROSH – Not for anything, Liadrin, but what would you even know about it?
LIADRIN – More than you might suppose, Warchief. A few years ago, shortly after the Outland campaign, I adopted a young blood elf girl from the Shattrath orphanage. She’s fifteen years old now. So, you see, I’m not completely unfamiliar with having no children one day, then suddenly having a grown child the next.
GARROSH – Yeah, well, that’s nice and all, Liadrin, but I’m sure I can handle it.
LIADRIN – I’m sure you can, sir. So does that mean you’ll be going to see her? Well before any possible departures?
GARROSH – This really isn’t any of your business, Liadrin.
LIADRIN – All things being equal, sir, I would agree. Though given that the past several days I’ve been taking it upon myself to help her with her transition, I suppose you might say I’ve developed a bit of a vested interest.
GARROSH – Liadrin, I get what you’re trying to do, and yeah, fine, you’ve kind of got a point about me going to talk to her, but you know what? I don’t know this girl. She shows up out of nowhere, and I don’t know the first thing about her. I don’t know what the fuck I’m supposed to SAY to her.
LIADRIN – (smiling kindly before beginning matter-of-factly) She grew up in Nagrand, and as a child lost her mother to a pernicious disease. She never knew her father, only through stories, and everything she’s heard of him has told her that he’s a monster. (walks to the door, turning back briefly before exiting) I’m sure you’ll come up with something.
Paternity (part 2)
So, picking up right where we left off last time…
* In Garrosh’s most recent mailbag, he discussed the lank distemper, a disease that ravaged the Kurenai of Nagrand at roughly the same time the orcs were afflicted with the red pox.
Well, I guess that’s what I get for giving that job to a 15-year-old, right? Oh well. Moving on with the record from Taktani. (Let’s keep our fingers crossed on this one…)
(Yay, Mr. Warchief is letting me be his scribe again! I better do a good job because I guess Mr. Warchief was checking on how Mr. Gurtash was doing and he wasn’t too happy. Everyone else seems a little upset, too. I guess being a scribe is super important work! Mr. Gurtash looked really embarrassed when he left. I hope he doesn’t feel too bad because I think he draws good. He even draws me! Yay! Oh wait I think they’re talking about me!)
SHAYARI – Okay, so that was weird.
FARANELL – You get used to it after a while.
SHAYARI – So, who’s this one now?
GARROSH – Really, the less you ask about her, the better.
MALKOROK – More importantly, goat, we’ll be the ones asking the questions.
TAKTANI – Hi! I’m Taktani!
LIADRIN – Shayari, this is another of Garrosh’s assistants—
TAKTANI – But you can call me Tak!
SHAYARI – Oh, so she’s filling in for the pipsqueak now?
TAKTANI – Or Tak-Tak!
GARROSH – How many times do I have to tell you, THAT’S NOT HOW IT WORKS!
SHAYARI – Well, at least she seems a little cheerier than Chuckles over there.
(That made Mr. Malkorok really mad. He seems to be pretty grumpy. He spends a lot of time with Mr. Warchief so I guess he must help him a lot, but I wish he wouldn’t yell so much.)
MALKOROK – Warchief, one swing! That’s all I ask! One swing is all I’ll need to silence this…this creature permanently.
(I don’t think I like him very much. It makes me sad. =( )
GARROSH – Malk, last time, cool it.
MALKOROK – Count yourself lucky the Warchief is so merciful, goat!
SHAYARI – You mad, bro?
MALKOROK – I— you— how dare— sir— UNGH! (He paced around a few seconds, shaking his fists, grinding his teeth, and looking at Mr. Warchief now and then) I… I think I need to walk a bit. If you’ll excuse me, sir…
(Mr. Malkorok stormed off and started stomping back and forth near the bank. It sounded like he was grumbling to himself. I’m not sure, but I think he might have punched a couple people, too. That’s mean! =( )
SPAZZLE – Okay, so whether you’re really Garrosh’s daughter or not, I already like you.
(OMG Mr. Warchief is a daddy?!? YAY!!! That’s so exciting!!)
GARROSH – So hang on. Even assuming this is all true – which we ARE going to check — how did you wind up HERE?
SHAYARI – I was living in Dalaran studying to be a mage when…well, when Jaina went all schizo.
GARROSH – Gotta say, I knew it was only a matter of time before she went off the deep end.
SHAYARI – Oh my Light, I know! She thinks she’s such a big deal, rolling into town and taking over, and being all Emo Queen of Pain, and… Oh, and Kalecgos! Have you heard about her and Kalecgos? You should see how she leads that poor dragon around by the nose!
GARROSH – Heh, yeah. I’ve kinda gotten that sense from those two…
SHAYARI – No, no, I mean literally! He has a nose ring in his dragon form, and she’s got this leash, and— and— oh spirits it’s so sad.
GARROSH – Hah! Hahaha…that’s…that’s kind of awesome.
SHAYARI – Awesomely sad.
(I like when Mr. Warchief gets happy like this. He doesn’t yell as much! Not like Mr. Malkorok.)
GARROSH – So hang on, if you’ve been staying with the Sunreavers all this time, how come this is the first I’m hearing about it?
LIADRIN – She wasn’t with the Sunreavers, sir. At least not until the purge was well underway.
SHAYARI – I stayed mostly over on the Silver Covenant part of Dalaran. People knew I was half orcish…most of the time I would pass as full draenei, but the other draenei could see it. It wasn’t as big a deal when I was back in Nagrand, but… (shrugs) Anyway. After Jaina had her little hissy fit, anyone with any Horde ties became pretty unwelcome in Dalaran. My being half orc was close enough for some of them, I guess.
GARROSH – So, wait, if people knew you were half orc, does that mean they knew—
SHAYARI – I never talked to people about who my father was. My mom told me, and a few people back in Telaar knew, but…
LIADRIN – I would imagine it was for the best that the Kirin Tor didn’t know of her full parentage.
GARROSH – Yeah, I figure that would have made her a lot less popular a lot sooner.
SHAYARI – Oh my Light, you should hear the things they say about you there! The things they talk about you doing! I figured all those stories had to be some kind of Alliance propaganda to make you look bad!
(Everyone just kind of looked at each other for a minute. I don’t really understand why. Maybe they were trying to figure out why people would want to say mean things about Mr. Warchief? That’s mean, especially since he’s a daddy now!
Mr. Warchief looked around at everyone being all quiet.)
GARROSH – WELL DON’T EVERYONE AGREE WITH HER AT ONCE!
LIADRIN – Clearly propaganda, yes, sir.
SPAZZLE – Don’t know where people come up with this stuff, chief.
FARANELL – Unless, you know, they exist in this universe and have eyes. But sure, whatever does it for you.
(Mr. Malkorok came back over to us. He didn’t seem so mad now, but it’s hard to tell since he’s always kind of grumpy.)
MALKOROK – Apologies for my…outburst, Warchief.
GARROSH – Yeah, it’s fine, Malk. So anyway, you said the doc has some way of checking out this story?
LIADRIN – Yes, sir. Obviously the doctor himself can comment with greater authority on the details.
(While they were talking, Mr. Warchief’s wyvern Mr. Mortimer came wandering over to us. He passed by Mr. Malkorok first, and I guess he maybe thought Mr. Malkorok was a tree? Because he kind of…well…lifted his leg…on his leg.)
MALKOROK – UGHH this damned flea-bitten— I— GAHH I’ll be back…
(Mr. Malkorok stomped off again. Mr. Mortimer walked up to Miss Shayari and nuzzled against her leg. Aww!)
SHAYARI – Aww, (That’s what I said!) who’s this? (petting the wyvern)
GARROSH – That’s Mortimer.
SHAYARI – (still petting) You named him Mortimer?
GARROSH – Actually, no.
SPAZZLE – It came from that D.E.H.T.A. guy, didn’t it?
GARROSH – Yeah.
SHAYARI – Oh, those hippies? (petting more) Well, it’s okay, Mortimer, you’re a handsome boy even if the crazy hippies did give you a silly name.
LIADRIN – Shay, perhaps you could take the wyvern for a walk while we discuss a few things.
SHAYARI – Sure. Come on, Mortimer!
(Miss Shayari and Mr. Morty started walking around the Valley of Strength. The rest of us watched her walk away.)
TAKTANI – I like her! She seems nice!
SPAZZLE – Not gonna lie. She had me at “You mad, bro?”
LIADRIN – Warchief? Any thoughts?
GARROSH – I don’t know. But her story from Nagrand…well, she’s got her details straight. At least the names and dates.
(Mr. Warchief looked across the valley for a minute to watch Miss Shayari and Mr. Mortimer walking by the main gate.)
GARROSH – Mortimer seems to like her.
SPAZZLE – Yeah, he took to her right away.
GARROSH – He is a pretty good judge of character.
FARANELL – This would be the wyvern that likes you, correct?
GARROSH – Your point being, Easy-Break?
FARANELL – Just citing further evidence to your point, obviously.
LIADRIN – Loathe though I am to agree with the overlord—
SPAZZLE – Isn’t it funny how you’ve known him for like five minutes, and you already hate to admit he might have a point?
LIADRIN – …he does raise a valid concern. The details of Shayari’s past all build on information that could have been acquired, albeit with some measure of difficulty.
GARROSH – Yeah. They would have to do some digging, but they could have pieced it together.
LIADRIN – The fact that she comes from Dalaran is cause for us to be all the more wary.
(Mr. Warchief looked across at Miss Shayari, who was still walking with Mr. Mortimer around the Valley of Strength. In front of the Broken Tusk, she started talking with one of the orcs, Mr. Thathung.)
GARROSH – What do you really think?
LIADRIN – I think that if she is who she says she is, she lives in a better world than we do.
GARROSH – …In Common, please?
LIADRIN – (sighing but smiling) I only mean that if she is your daughter, sir, she’s grown up hearing stories from the Alliance about the orcs, and about you in particular, and yet she’s come here fully expecting to be embraced by her father and given a home. As she said herself, she’s been told countless reasons to consider you a villain – and rejected all of them as lies. If that really is her, I may even envy her.
GARROSH – So you believe her.
LIADRIN – I would still counsel prudence. But I prefer to hope for the best in people.
GARROSH – Sounds like you live in a “better world” yourself.
LIADRIN – No, I don’t. That’s why I hate to give up on the possibility of an unbroken soul. I know this world well enough to understand how rare they are.
(Over by the Broken Tusk, Shayari had been continuing to talk with Mr. Thathung all this time – only she looked like she was getting pretty upset with Mr. Thathung for some reason. Now she finally hit him! Um…a whole bunch of times! Over and over and over, really angry-like! Oh no!)
SHAYARI – (in the distance, but still clearly audible) Hey, I said to WATCH THE HANDS, Grabby McWanderpaws! (flinging Mr. Thathung against the auction house wall and continuing to beat him senseless) Yeah! See how you like people grabbing YOU! NEXT TIME I’LL TAKE YOUR FUCKING HAND CLEAN OFF AND FUCKING FEED IT TO YOU – IN REVERSE!
(Mr. Warchief, Ms. Liadrin, Mr. Goblin, and Dr. Zombie looked back and forth at each other.)
SPAZZLE – Huh.
GARROSH – Well then.
FARANELL – So, yeah, I can still do the tests if you want, but honestly, if you ask me, it’s just going to be a waste of perfectly good ichor.
So…yeah. I still have a million and one things to deal with here in Orgrimmar before I head back to Pandaria, but…well, now I guess that’s going to be a million and two.
Stay tuned.
Spazzle Speaks: Tours of Duty
A little Earth Online interlude while Garrosh spins his yarn from Pandaria…
You have logged on.
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Interesting. What kind of research, Leslie?
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] hi baddie
[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered: Hey mon.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] its really pretty technical
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] HI MRBADCRUMBLE
[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] hey everyone
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] probably pretty boring if its not what you do
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: hey
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Greetings, Spazzle.
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] i can try to explain some of it to you if you think it would help.
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] hey
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Oh I’m sure it’s fascinating.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] lol prof
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: I just got back from the echo isles a little while ago
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] i’ve got a handle on it, prof, its my job after all
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] If you’d care to elaborate, of course.
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Certainly no intrusion intended if you prefer not to.
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] working on Jaina again?
[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered: Tanks for checkin’ up on it for me, mon.
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] well yes, but i would imagine understanding the nielas vector hypothesis would be part of your job, too, and we’ve already established you don’t really have a handle on that.
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Everyone needs a hobby. ^_^
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] omg i do too
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: it’s fine
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] u think your right about everything
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: I had some business down there anyway
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] oh hardly.
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] i know my nielas vectors, though.
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: hey
[Lorthemar] has logged on.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] look, i supervise mages for a living, i would think i know about nielas vectors
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] i would think you’d know about them, too.
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] so see? i’m not always right.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] ugh whatever
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] hi lor
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: just had to be careful not to be seen by any kor’kron on the way
[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin] Hey, Lor mon.
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] I STILL WANT TO KNOW HOW YOU KNOW ALL THIS STUFF PROF
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] i’ve said before, i read a lot.
[Guild][Lorthemar] Greetings, all!
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] brb
[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered: You run into any trouble?
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] HI LOR
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Good evening, Lor’themar.
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: not really
[Guild][Lorthemar] And how is everyone this fine evening?
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] hey lor’themar
[Officer][Lorthemar] Good evening.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] doing ok
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] How are you settling in on…the Isle of Thunder, is it?
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] just missing my baby
[Officer][Lorthemar] Yes indeed.
[Officer][Lorthemar] Not badly at all. Setting up took some doing, but we had some good help on hand.
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: there are more kor’kron in razor hill than there used to be
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] AWWW
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] It’s good you were able to get your internet connection working from there.
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] I know our…esteemed Warchief has been having stability issues.
[Guild][Lorthemar] Oh? I thought you two sat next to each other while you played.
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Goodness, I just reread the last thing I said, and I must say it gave me quite the chuckle. ^_^
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: I think after they rebuilt the inn, they used it as an excuse to ramp up security
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] not right now
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] At any rate, I know I would be lost without my connection.
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] I’ve noticed you really seem to be online, like, ALL the time
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] WE USUALLY DO
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] i’m away on business for a little while
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] I don’t think I’ve logged on without you being here
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Well, that’s partly because, being undead, I don’t strictly need to sleep.
[Guild][Lorthemar] Oh, I see
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Which frees up lots of online time.
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] don’t you have work you need to do in the undercity, though?
[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered: Garrosh give ’em enough time, they be makin’ lots more places “secure.”
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] so for right now the game is a way for us to still hang out together a little
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Yes, but I just take it with me everywhere.
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Some of the warlocks worked out a way to project a likeness of my computer screen onto a writing tablet I carry around – an Eye Pad of Kilrogg, they call it.
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] IT MAKES ME GLAD I STARTED PLAYING THIS GAME
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: anyway, I got down there without much trouble
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] The name, I will admit, is inelegant. I may have marketing give it another pass.
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] EVEN IF I’M STILL KIND OF A NOOB
[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered: What’s da word from Trall?
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: Ji?
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] its ok, sweetie, being a newbie might be a nice change of pace for you
[Guild][Lorthemar] You know, it’s a funny coincidence, I’m doing some traveling for work as well.
[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin] I know how dat goes, mon.
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: all clear so far
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] LOR’THEMAR
[Officer][Lorthemar] Yes?
[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin] Dis game be a way for me ta talk ta people too.
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: nobody seems to have noticed anything going on down there
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] oh wow small world
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] -Don’t- say any more about what you’re doing.
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Improbable though it would seem, I don’t think she realizes who you really are.
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: which is kind of weird, considering it’s been months since they took out the kor’kron occupation
[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin] Been tryin’ ta not talk too much fa real what wit I got a nasty sore troat dese days, mon.
[Officer][Lorthemar] Yeah, don’t remind me. I get that a lot.
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Well, yes, there’s that.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] i hope you feel better, bobby
[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered: While Garrosh still be in Pandaria, Eitrigg be da one mindin’ da store in Orgrimmar
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] But you’re also wasting a potential tactical advantage if you give away too much around her.
[HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] has earned the achievement [Grand Central Station]!
[EdwardBear | Ji] has earned the achievement [Grand Central Station]!
[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered: He be no friend a da changes Malkorok been makin’ in da Kor’kron.
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: yeah
[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin] Hey, grats, mon!
[Officer][Lorthemar] How do you mean?
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: I just wish things would get back to normal again
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: or more normal at least
[Guild][Lorthemar] Congratulations, all!
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: sorry, leslie was running me and puff through an instance
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] THANKS DEAR
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] …Really?
[Officer][Lorthemar] Really what?
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] my pleasure sweetie =)
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: i didn’t see your tell till just now
[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered: Dey gonna get worse before dey get better, mon.
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: yeah
[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji] ty leslie
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: it’s ok
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Has…nobody told you who Proudleslie is?
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] yw eddie
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] I haven’t…
[Officer][Lorthemar] No, who is she?
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: did you find anything out?
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] OH WOW ONE MORE BUBBLE AND I’LL LEVEL TOO
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] oh boy
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Proudleslie is Jaina Proudmoore.
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: I talked to thrall, yeah
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] next thing u know your going to be all grown up!
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] = )
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: had to be careful not to give away too much
[Officer][Lorthemar] …
[Officer][Lorthemar] She’s…she’s… WHY??
[Officer][Lorthemar] WHY would we let her be in the guild?
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: what did he say?
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] then i can get you all geared up and ready for big people adventures!
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] Sylvanas convinced Garrosh to let her stay.
[Officer][Lorthemar] By convincing him we’re living in Upside Down Crazy Land??
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: the easiest place for you to reach the earthen ring is at the twilight citadel
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] I APPRECIATE ALL THE TIME YOU’VE BEEN SPENDING HELPING ME LEVEL
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: most of their heavy hitters are still over at the maelstrom, but they usually don’t let just anyone over there
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] No, Regent-Lord, by pointing out that keeping her close, without her knowing who -we- are, puts us in a position to ply her for information that might be of use to us.
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] how’s that been working out for you, by the way?
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] aww, anything for my baby
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: ok
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Hush now. It’s an ongoing project.
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] At any rate, Lor’themar, please try to be careful what you say
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: so your best bet is to head down to the twilight highlands
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] i kinda like getting to take care of you here after everything you do for me
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] MY PLEASURE, M’LADY
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: they’ve been working on setting up again there since the twilight’s hammer was driven out
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] <3
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: what’s that?
[Officer][Lorthemar] Ugh, fine.
[Officer][Lorthemar] This is not good for my rage.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] aww thats my lil puffy magic dragon =)
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: what’s what?
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] = )
[Officer][Lorthemar] And of course Garrosh took the anger management counselor with him to Pandaria.
[Officer][Lorthemar] To spite me, I’ll bet you anything.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] plus did i mention you look sexy as a fireman?
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: the twilight’s hammer
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] rawr 😉
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] To be fair, keeping an anger management specialist close to Garrosh is probably a wise move.
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] she’s kind of got you there
[Officer][Lorthemar] *looks in guild chat*
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji] long story
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] i wish i could adequately impress upon you the sheer magnitude of the fact that you’re making *me* want to vomit.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] oh boo prof, havent u ever been in love before
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji] last year’s bad guys
[Officer][Lorthemar] I can’t believe this woman is beating me.
[Officer][Lorthemar] Anyway…
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: oh
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] as a matter of fact.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] what happened?
[Officer][Lorthemar] Let’s talk about something else before I get too annoyed.
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] the scourge.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] oh =(
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] at any rate, i should log for now, i have some packing to do.
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: i really don’t know if it’s going to accomplish much going to them, though
[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin] Be seein’ ya, mon!
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] BYE PROF
[Officer][Lorthemar] Hmm, speaking of which, do you know anything about what’s going on with Faranell?
[ProfHubert | Faranell] has logged off.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] sorry if i brought up bad memories prof
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: it’s worth a try
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] I was going to ask you, actually.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] blah missed him
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] All I know is that he’s going to Orgrimmar at the request of your Lady Liadrin.
[Officer][Lorthemar] That’s all I know as well.
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: if anyone will have any ideas about what happened to mokvar, it would be them
[Officer][Lorthemar] Liadrin told me she was requesting Faranell from you, but was rather dodgy about details.
[Officer][Lorthemar] I’d assumed she would have told you more.
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: i hate to say it, but i think we might already know what happened to mokvar
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Not particularly, only that she had need of his alchemical skills for some of her work with the Dalaran refugees.
[Officer][Lorthemar] Don’t they have apothecaries in Orgrimmar?
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] Tons over in the Valley of Spirits.
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] I raised that point myself. All she would say was that it’s a matter of some delicacy and she would prefer to call on someone she knows.
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: it’s possible mokvar is really gone
[Officer][Lorthemar] It’s exhausting having our supposed underlings running around on their own like this.
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Preaching to the choir, Regent-Lord.
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: if he is, and i go, then he won’t be any more gone, and all i’ll have done is waste some of my own time
[Officer][Lorthemar] We need better minions.
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] We really do.
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: if he’s not, and i don’t go, then it might cost us something more valuable
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: the only mistake would be not to act
[Officer][Lorthemar] Hmm, guild chat is quiet.
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: believe me, I hope you find something.
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: I’m just trying not to get my hopes up
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Jaina and Kalecgos are probably talking in tells.
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: well either way, i should be back soon
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: i should get going
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: me too
[Officer][Lorthemar] I wonder what they’re talking about that’s so secret.
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: talk to you soon
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: good luck
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Probably you.
You have logged off.
Spazzle Speaks: The Goblin is Always Greener on the Other Side of Guild Chat
After Garrosh put up that guild chat log yesterday, I thought it might be helpful to see things from another perspective…
You have logged on.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] hi baddie
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] check the appendix, then.
[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji] hi mrbadcrumble
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] it should be on a right-hand page, under a map if i recall.
[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered: Hey, mon.
[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] hey everyone
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Good evening, Spazzle.
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] hey sylvanas
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] ok ok fine, i know better than to argue with you about these things
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: hey, how are you feeling?
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] I DONT WANT TO IMAGINE HOW MUCH TIME YOU MUST HAVE SPENT IN LIBRARIES STUDYING THIS STUFF PROF
[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered: Better, mon.
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] should I even ask what they’re arguing about this time?
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] if only you knew.
[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered: Chen say pretty soon I be healed up enough ta be back on ma feet an outta dis monastery.
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Honestly, I’m not even sure how they got started.
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: that’s good
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] ah
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] seriously you must be some kind of master wizard with everything you seem to know
[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered: Can’t happen soon enough, mon – don’ like dis sittin’ around.
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] not really.
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] so what are you working on? are we about to get achievement spammed as usual?
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] i’m not particularly powerful as a caster; i just have a good handle on theory.
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: yeah but you have to take care of yourself
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] YOU’D PROBABLY BE A GOOD TEACHER THEN
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Nothing imminent. I’m laying the groundwork for some longer-term projects at the moment.
[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered: Any news from Trall?
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] maybe thats why his name is professor! =)
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] meh.
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] i think of it more as “professor” in the “mad scientist” sense.
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: not last i heard
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] which is fitting, considering i spend most of my time in a laboratory developing biochemical agents of mass destruction.
[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] has logged on.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] haha yea right, your being sarcastic again
You whispered to [LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]: have you talked to lorthemar?
[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered: When ya see ’im let ’im know I be dere as soon as I can, an den we deal wit’ Garrosh.
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] drat, i’ve been caught.
[LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] whispered: Speak the devil’s name…
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] hi pwn
[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin] Hey OmgipwneduMon!
[LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] whispered: Oops, mistell.
[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered: Speak a da devil, mon.
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Hey
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] hey boss
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Greetings, dear Warchief.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] is your connection any better pwn?
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] I guess we’ll find out in a minute
You whispered to [LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]: k good
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] lol
[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] has logged off.
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: i really don’t like all this sneaking around
[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin] Haha!
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] omg
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] now see, for instance, i can’t work -that- kind of magic.
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] i just deploy verbal irony; i can’t conjure it up in actual events.
[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered: Ya won’ need to much longer.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] i swear i didnt do that!
[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] has logged on.
[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered: Soon we’ll be makin’ our move.
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] UGH
[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin] Leslie! Do it again, mon!
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] WB PWN
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] i didnt do anything!
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] I take it your connection is none too improved since last time, Warchief?
[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin] You put da connection voodoo on him, mon!
You whispered to [Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]: still using the network grizzle set up for you?
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Yeah, apparently
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Also that Bob guy is rubbing me the wrong way already
[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered: Yeah
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] On the topic of what you’ve been doing, Leslie, has work continued to be hectic?
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] He’d better watch it before I end up stabbing him in the neck
You whispered to [Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]: honestly, you might as well hire a couple extra tauren to send up smoke signals for your wifi
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] You were starting to say, but ended up being sidetracked by ProfHubert.
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Speaking of me stabbing people, by the way, did you manage to get Lori straightened out?
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] BTW COULD I GET A GUILD INVITE FOR MY FRIEND
[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] sure puff, just whisper me the name
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] ugh not really
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] If you’re referring to leadership of the guild, I think I’ve convinced him to be reasonable and pass it back
[HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] whispered: HER NAME IS LIVINGREDGIRL
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] He was quite agitated before.
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] You know, not for anything, but didn’t we used to ask people to APPLY to this guild once upon a time?
You whispered to [HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]: seriously?
[HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] whispered: ?
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] does it really matter?
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] just some office politics i’m trying to stay out of mostly
You whispered to [HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]: don’t you think that’s going to be a little confusing?
[HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] whispered: Y
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] I don’t particularly care about his moods
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] does anyone in this guild actually do anything other than sit around in guild chat?
[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] has logged off.
[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji] i do!
You whispered to [HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]: because of how similar that is to LivinDeadGrl?
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] me to! just got my set bonus last night in fact
[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji] i’m level 52 now!
[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin] I mostly just hang out here in da capital cities, mon, an’ stir tings up in trade chat!
[HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] whispered: OH I DIDNT EVEN THINK OF THAT
[Lorthemar] has logged on.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] grats eddie
[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji] hi lorthemar
[HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] whispered: SHOULD I GET HER TO REROLL?
[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin] Somebody gotta be da resident smartass in dis guild, right?
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] hi lor!
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] um, i have some bad news for you…
You whispered to [HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]: no, she already has this toon… I just hope she doesn’t get a lot of mis-tells
[Guild][Lorthemar] Greetings, all!
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] hey lor
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Hello, Lor’themar.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] lol
You whispered to [HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]: I’ll send her an invite
[Officer][Lorthemar] Hail, Spazzle. Dark Lady.
[HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] whispered: TY
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] yea bobby, prof has seniority on you
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] if only you knew.
You have invited [LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza] to the guild.
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Lor’themar, I should probably warn you straight away…
[LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza] has joined the guild.
[LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza] has been promoted to the rank Recruit.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] he spends most of his time in-game making sarcastic comments to people
[Guild][Lorthemar] Welcome, LivingRedGirl!
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] welcome red!
[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] has logged on.
[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] there you go! welcome to the guild!
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] in point of fact, that’s not actually specific to in-game.
[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza] Thank you all
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] lol
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] wb pwn
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] So as I was saying. I don’t care if Ponytail is happy about it as long as he manages to get his panties unbunched long enough to hand over guild control
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Garrosh was just on and will likely be back momentarily, so please try to humor him.
[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered: Garrosh be runnin’ outta friends fast.
[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered: Oh and by the way
[Officer][Lorthemar] Hello, Garrosh…
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Oh drat. Two seconds too slow hitting return.
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Oh and LOOK who’s here now
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: yeah, but I’m *one* of his friends
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Oh goodness, LivingRedGirl, you look almost just like me!
[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered: Do you want to explain to me why I never heard a word from you about the whole Mokvar fiasco?
[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza] Haha looks like it yes
You whispered to [Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]: um
[Officer][Lorthemar] Good evening, Warchief.
[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered: YES UM
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] At any rate, Leslie…
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Yeah, yeah, good evening, good morning, happy new year, whatever
You whispered to [Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]: I guess I figured you were already getting updates from people more important than me
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] I know office politics can be precarious, Leslie. I’m not unfamiliar with them myself.
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Are you ready to stop fucking around and put me back in place as guild leader?
You whispered to [Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]: and I was probably still hoping there would be some explanation for everything
[Officer][Lorthemar] While I still have my objections to the way you’ve been conducting yourself toward me and my people, Garrosh…
[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered: Ya ever stop ta ask yaself why, mon?
[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered: At this point I don’t particularly CARE about why
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] mostly just a coworker trying to drag me into his conflicts
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Or am I going to have to smack a bitch up first?
You whispered to [Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]: look, I understand why you’re doing what you’re doing
[Officer][Lorthemar] …case in point.
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] The bitch being you, by the way
[Officer][Lorthemar] *sigh*
[Officer][Lorthemar] In any case…I don’t want to hurt the guild over our personal squabbles.
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: ugh hang on
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Ah, interesting…
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] That’s refreshingly non-suicidal for you, Eyepatch
[Officer][Lorthemar] So, yes, here.
You whispered to [Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]: with the mokvar thing
[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] has been promoted to the rank Guild Leader.
You whispered to [Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]: it’s just hard for me to accept a friend going off the deep end, is all
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] GRATS PWN
[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] has logged off.
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: ok that could have been ugly
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Is there anything particular to this conflict your coworker is trying to involve you in, Leslie?
[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin] Dis is way too entertainin’.
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: anyway, like I was saying
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Or is it more along the lines of your typical…in-office sparring?
[Officer][Lorthemar] I almost feel bad for him.
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] i tried to warn him about getting his network set up
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] 1 SEC SHE HAD TO AFK
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] but oh no, he sees a goblin and just figures “catch-all tech genius”
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Ah, I see. No rush.
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] since it appears most of my best sources of entertainment are away or disconnecting, i suppose i should go get some work done
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: look, I understand why you’re doing what you’re doing
[Guild][Lorthemar] Be well, ProfHubert!
[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] later prof
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] in my absence, bob, feel free to take over as interim satirist
[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin] Hah, tanks mon.
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] just try not to stage some kind of sardonic coup while i’m away
[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin] Haha, no promises, mon.
[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji] bye prof
[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] has logged on.
[Guild][MrBadCrumble | Spazzle] bye prof
[ProfHubert | Faranell] has logged off.
[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin] Welcome back, mon! We missed ya!
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] WB AGAIN PWN
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: and I’m helping thrall because, well, he’s thrall, and I don’t think it’s right the way the trolls are being treated
[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza] Welcome back Omgipwnedurface
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] UGH UGH UGH
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] wish I could do something to fix it, chief
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Yeah, I know
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] but I think you may be kind of stuck with it until you get back or orgrimmar
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] In all honesty, Warchief, the fact that you’re having such connection difficulties at the moment may be a reason not to resume control of the guild just yet…
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] I’m not sure there’s much to be gained from a guild leader who’s unable to be online to tend to the responsibilities of leadership.
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: but that’s as far as I can go
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Yeah, I hate to say it, but you might have a point
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] And frankly it’s getting way too annoying trying to stay on
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] I can well imagine.
You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]: I won’t stab him in the back
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] So yeah, let me do this
[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] has been promoted to the rank Guild Leader.
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] GRATS MRBADCRUMBLE
[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin] Hey, grats, mon!
[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza] Does leadership always change hands so often in the guild
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whoa seriously?
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] NOT REALLY
[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered: Ya got ta listen to ya conscience, mon.
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] He already has control of the web site and he’s got the best handle on all the nuts and bolts
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] WELL MAYBE LATELY YEAH
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] So just as well to let him mind the shop for now
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] A wise decision, of course, sir.
[Officer][Lorthemar] Congratulations, Spazzle.
[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered: I hope it’ll let ya sleep if tings go bad.
[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered: Also because, even with the Mokvar thing, you’re the only one of these clowns I actually trust
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] thanks lor
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Okay, so…
You whispered to [Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]: thanks chief
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] I’m going to empty my mail just in case, and then log off here before something else pisses me off
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Of course, sir.
[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered: And I get why you kept quiet
[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza] It’s gotten quiet
[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered: But let me make this clear
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] THAT USUALLY MEANS THE OFFICERS ARE TALKING
[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered: Mokvar is dead to me
[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza] Oh
[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered: And if I ever find out where he’s run off to, he’s a dead man
[Guild][Lorthemar] I know it can be a bit unnerving.
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: hey
[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered: Anyway…later
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: hi spazzle
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: you haven’t heard anything from mokvar, have you?
[Guild][Lorthemar] I wasn’t sure what to make of it myself when I first joined the guild.
[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] has logged off.
[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza] Are you new
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: not since he ran off
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: why?
[Guild][Lorthemar] …
[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji] oh hi lorthemar
[Guild][Lorthemar] No.
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: this is bad
[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji] did you join recently?
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: this is really bad
[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza] Me
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: what?
[Guild][Lorthemar] …
[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji] no, i could swear i’ve seen you before
[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza] I only just joined a few minutes ago
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: you remember the recall totem I told you about? the one he left me to hold?
[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji] lorthemar seems new though
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: yes
[Guild][Lorthemar] I…
[Officer][Livindeadgrl | Sylvanas] Perhaps you just have one of those faces?
[Guild][Lorthemar] I believe I need to log off and step away from the game for a bit.
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: the spirit link that a shaman makes with these totems makes them give off a green glow
[Guild][Lorthemar] It’s not good for my rage.
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: it just went out
[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji] i’m sorry if i upset you, lorthemar
[Lorthemar] has logged off.
[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji] oh bother
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: oh
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] back
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: that’s bad?
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: yeah
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] sorry
[Guild][Livindeadgrl | Sylvanas] Welcome back, Leslie.
[Guild][Livindeadgrl | Sylvanas] Now where were we?
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: the only reason the totem would go out like that is if mokvar were dead
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] sorry livindead, i cant right now
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: but he can just wake up again, right? like last time?
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] i just came back to say bye and log
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] theres stuff happening here rl and i need to go
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: no, not like ‘waiting for my ankh to kick in’ dead
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] and so does puffy
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: like for real dead
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] like right now
[HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] has logged off.
[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered: oh dear
[Guild][MrBadCrumble | Spazzle] actually i need to run too
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: I need to go
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Is everything all right, Spazzle?
You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]: I have to check on this
[Officer][MrBadCrumble | Spazzle] no
You have logged off.
I hate wireless networks
Here’s another example why.
You have logged on.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] haha yea right, your being sarcastic again
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] drat, i’ve been caught.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] hi pwn
[Guild][Bob] Hey OmgipwneduMon!
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Hey
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] hey boss
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Greetings, dear Warchief.
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] is your connection any better pwn?
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] I guess we’ll find out in a minute
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] lol
You have been disconnected.
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You have logged on.
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] UGH
[Guild][Bob] Leslie! Do it again, mon!
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] WB PWN
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] i didnt do anything!
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] I take it your connection is none too improved since last time, Warchief?
[Guild][Bob] You put da connection voodoo on him, mon!
[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered: still using the network grizzle set up for you?
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Yeah, apparently
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Also that Bob guy is rubbing me the wrong way already
You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]: Yeah
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] On the topic of what you’ve been doing, Leslie, has work continued to be hectic?
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] He’d better watch it before I end up stabbing him in the neck
[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered: honestly, you might as well hire a couple extra tauren to send up smoke signals for your wifi
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] You were starting to say, but ended up being sidetracked by ProfHubert.
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Speaking of me stabbing people, by the way, did you manage to get Lori straightened out?
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] BTW COULD I GET A GUILD INVITE FOR MY FRIEND
[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] sure puff, just whisper me the name
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] ugh not really
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] If you’re referring to leadership of the guild, I think I’ve convinced him to be reasonable and pass it back
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] He was quite agitated before.
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] You know, not for anything, but didn’t we used to ask people to APPLY to this guild once upon a time?
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] does it really matter?
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] just some office politics i’m trying to stay out of mostly
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] I don’t particularly care about his moods
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] does anyone in this guild actually do anything other than sit around in guild chat?
You have been disconnected.
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You have logged on.
[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] there you go! welcome to the guild!
[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell] in point of fact, that’s not actually specific to in-game.
[Guild][LivingRedGirl] Thank you all
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] lol
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] wb pwn
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] So as I was saying. I don’t care if Ponytail is happy about it as long as he manages to get his panties unbunched long enough to hand over guild control
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Garrosh was just on and will likely be back momentarily, so please try to humor him.
You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]: Oh and by the way
[Officer][Lorthemar] Hello, Garrosh…
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Oh drat. Two seconds too slow hitting return.
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh Oh and LOOK who’s here now
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Oh goodness, LivingRedGirl, you look almost just like me!
You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]: Do you want to explain to me why I never heard a word from you about the whole Mokvar fiasco?
[Guild][LivingRedGirl] Haha looks like it yes
[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered: um
[Officer][Lorthemar] Good evening, Warchief.
You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]: YES UM
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] At any rate, Leslie…
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Yeah, yeah, good evening, good morning, happy new year, whatever
[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered: I guess I figured you were already getting updates from people more important than me
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] I know office politics can be precarious, Leslie. I’m not unfamiliar with them myself.
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Are you ready to stop fucking around and put me back in place as guild leader?
[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered: and I was probably still hoping there would be some explanation for everything
[Officer][Lorthemar] While I still have my objections to the way you’ve been conducting yourself toward me and my people, Garrosh…
You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]: At this point I don’t particularly CARE about why
[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina] mostly just a coworker trying to drag me into his conflicts
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Or am I going to have to smack a bitch up first?
[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered: look, I understand why you’re doing what you’re doing
[Officer][Lorthemar] …case in point.
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] The bitch being you, by the way
[Officer][Lorthemar] *sigh*
[Officer][Lorthemar] In any case…I don’t want to hurt the guild over our personal squabbles.
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Ah, interesting…
[Officer][Lorthemar] So, yes, here.
[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered: with the mokvar thing
[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] has been promoted to the rank Guild Leader.
[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered: it’s just hard for me to accept a friend going off the deep end, is all
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] GRATS PWN
You have been disconnected.
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You have logged on.
[Guild][MrBadCrumble | Spazzle] bye prof
[ProfHubert | Faranell] has logged off.
[Guild][Bob] Welcome back, mon! We missed ya!
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] WB AGAIN PWN
[Guild][LivingRedGirl] Welcome back Omgipwnedurface
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] UGH UGH UGH
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] wish I could do something to fix it, chief
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Yeah, I know
[Lorthemar] whispered: Now that we’ve settled the guild issue, Warchief…
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] but I think you may be kind of stuck with it until you get back or orgrimmar
[Lorthemar] whispered: Well…can we talk man to man?
You whispered to [Lorthemar]: Yeah okay
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] In all honesty, Warchief, the fact that you’re having such connection difficulties at the moment may be a reason not to resume control of the guild just yet…
[Lorthemar] whispered: Well, concerning the goings-on in Pandaria…
You whispered to [Lorthemar]: Actually, I don’t know. CAN we?
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] I’m not sure there’s much to be gained from a guild leader who’s unable to be online to tend to the responsibilities of leadership.
[Lorthemar] whispered: …
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Yeah, I hate to say it, but you might have a point
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] And frankly it’s getting way too annoying trying to stay on
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] I can well imagine.
[Lorthemar] whispered: Never mind.
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] So yeah, let me do this
[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] has been promoted to the rank Guild Leader.
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] GRATS MRBADCRUMBLE
[Guild][Bob] Hey, grats, mon!
You whispered to [Lorthemar]: Whatever, Lori
[Guild][LivingRedGirl] Does leadership always change hands so often in the guild
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whoa seriously?
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] NOT REALLY
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] He already has control of the web site and he’s got the best handle on all the nuts and bolts
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] WELL MAYBE LATELY YEAH
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] So just as well to let him mind the shop for now
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] A wise decision, of course, sir.
[Officer][Lorthemar] Congratulations, Spazzle.
You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]: Also because, even with the Mokvar thing, you’re the only one of these clowns I actually trust
[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] thanks lor
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Okay, so…
[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispers: thanks chief
[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] I’m going to empty my mail just in case, and then log off here before something else pisses me off
[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Of course, sir.
You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]: And I get why you kept quiet
[Guild][LivingRedGirl] It’s gotten quiet
You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]: But let me make this clear
[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] THAT USUALLY MEANS THE OFFICERS ARE TALKING
You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]: Mokvar is dead to me
[Guild][LivingRedGirl] Oh
You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]: And if I ever find out where he’s run off to, he’s a dead man
[Guild][Lorthemar] I know it can be a bit unnerving.
You whispered to [MrBadCrumble | Spazzle] Anyway…later
[Guild][Lorthemar] I wasn’t sure what to make of it myself when I first joined the guild.
You have logged off.
Moments of transition
After the last straw that was Garona’s report the other day, I decided that enough was enough. I’d spent enough time flying half blind though everything and not calling in every possible resource. So today I took a trip back to Tian Monastery to get some answers out of that Elder Cloudfall guy about this “destiny” I’m supposed to have. This time I wasn’t taking no for an answer – if I had to beat some answers out of his cryptic panda ass, so be it.
I brought Ben-Lin along for the trip, since I figured she seemed to get along well enough with Cloudfall the last time, and maybe having her in tow might make it a little easier to bring him around. I also brought Taktani, to take her first crack at transcribing…and Gurtash, too…you know, just in case.
Luckily, this time, Cloudfall was out strolling around the grounds when we arrived, so we didn’t have to waste time tracking him down. So…over to Tak…
(We landed at the monastery place and everybody got all excited to see a pudgy fuzzy panda man going for a walk.)
GARROSH – It’s Elder Cloudfall! Yay!
GURTASH – Yay!
BEN-LIN – Yay!
TAKTANI – I don’t know who that is, but yay too!
CLOUDFALL – Hi, Mr. Warchief! It’s really good to see you again because I guess we’ve met before, only Tak wasn’t there for that. But I bet it was fun!
GARROSH – It was!
BEN-LIN – Lots of fun!
CLOUDFALL – Oh that’s good! I’m so glad I didn’t miss it!
TAKTANI – Aw, I guess I did miss it! I’m sorry I wasn’t there too!
CLOUDFALL – Me too!
GURTASH – Me too too!
BEN-LIN – But you’re here now, Tak!
TAKTANI – Yay!
GARROSH – Yay!
CLOUDFALL – Yay!
GARROSH – Well I’m sure super happy to see you again, Mr. Panda! Hold on a minute, I have to talk to Tak!
(So that’s when Mr. Warchief asked to look at my transcript to see how I was doing do far, and he got really mad for some reason and yelled at me, and I’m not going to write those things down because I don’t want to make Mr. Warchief look mean and then people might not like him as much. But he told me I should just try to write down exactly what everyone says, word for word, and not – oh here, I can just show you!)
GARROSH – So, yeah, Tak, you should just try to write down exactly what everyone says, word for word, and not do these…embellishments or translations into Tak-speak or whatever, okay?
(See? So I guess I’ll try to do that because I don’t want Mr. Warchief to get mad again, especially after some of the things he said he was going to do, they sound like they would hurt. But I don’t want you to think Mr. Warchief is mean! He probably just didn’t sleep too well and that’s why he’s grumpy. Maybe he needs a new bed because he maybe doesn’t sleep well a lot. Anyway I guess being a scribe is really serious so I’d better try to concentrate.)
CLOUDFALL – It’s a pleasure to welcome you once again to Tian. Lady Cloudstrider, and Gurtash, I believe?
BEN-LIN – The pleasure is mine, Elder.
GURTASH – Oh wow, you remember me?
CLOUDFALL – Indeed! I never forget a face, or a name.
GARROSH – Oh great, another guy with an uber-memory. Nothing ever goes wrong with those guys.
(I didn’t understand what that meant but Mr. Warchief gave me a mean look when he saw I was going to ask something. Maybe Mr. D and Mr. U can explain later.)
CLOUDFALL – One face is unfamiliar to me, however, Warchief Garrosh. Tell me, who is your feline friend?
GARROSH – Oh…yeah. Her. This is Taktani. She’s helping spot Gurtash a little as my scribe and record-keeper.
TAKTANI – Hi, Mr. Panda! It’s nice to meet you! You can call me Tak! Or Tak-Tak, if that’s the way—
GARROSH – Don’t get started on that shit again.
TAKTANI – But Mr. Warchief, I just—
GARROSH – Anyway, she’s kind of in her trial period. Her really, really tenuous trial period.
CLOUDFALL – Ah, well, I’m sure she’ll perform admirably.
GARROSH – That’s because this is your first time meeting her.
( 🙁 )
CLOUDFALL – In any case, I should provide an introduction in kind. You all remember our hozen friend, I’m sure.
(Oh I forgot to mention there was a monkey man, like the one at our fort, walking with Mr. Panda!)
CLOUDFALL – Taktani, allow me to introduce Zhi-Zhi.
ZHI-ZHI – Much pleasings to be making your acquaintances.
TAKTANI – Your name is Zhi-Zhi, Mr. Monkey?
ZHI-ZHI – The emphasizings should be on the first syllable, but yes.
TAKTANI – So we do say everyone’s name twice here!
BEN-LIN – No, Taktani, we say people’s names normally here. It is simply a naming tradition among some of the hozen.
TAKTANI – Oh, I think that’s what Mr. D and Mr. U were telling me before.
GARROSH – I can’t believe I’m about to say this, but yeah, Dontrag and Utvoch were right. So…congratulations, universe. You win again.
BEN-LIN – Oh, is that who “Mr. D and Mr. U” are?
GARROSH – Yeah, Ben. You’ve met them?
BEN-LIN – Briefly, yes. I only was able to speak with them for a short time before I needed to go due to the mysterious onset of a terrible headache.
TAKTANI – I’m sorry you didn’t feel good. Are you better now, Ms. Ben-Lin-Lin?
BEN-LIN – I am, thank you.
TAKTANI – Or is it Ms. Ben-Ben-Lin?
BEN-LIN – Although I believe it may be returning.
GARROSH – Tak, just zip it and try to focus on the scribing, okay?
TAKTANI – Okay, Mr. War-war-chief-chief. Chief.
GARROSH – THAT’S NOT HOW NAMES WORK HERE.
BEN-LIN – It is a curious thing, Garrosh: there are times when I would swear that you are, in fact, heroically even-tempered.
GURTASH – (leans over to me) Make sure you get that down.
CLOUDFALL – Zhi-Zhi, while our guests are here, why don’t you take Gurtash’s mount to the stable. Do you have your wyvern with you as well, Warchief Garrosh?
GARROSH – Mortimer? No, not here with us.
(Elder Cloudfall waved to Mr. Zhi, and Mr. Zhi led Gurtash’s wyvern away.)
CLOUDFALL – I’m surprised, Warchief. You seemed rather attached to the animal; I would have thought you would bring him with you.
GARROSH – Well, I rode him out here for the trip. But there was a pond with some cranes nearby and so I figured I’d let him go do some hunting for lunch while we were here.
CLOUDFALL – Oh…Warchief Garrosh, I’m not sure if that was wise. The Jade Forest is full of predators.
GARROSH – And?
CLOUDFALL – Well…are you not worried that your wyvern will be harmed?
(Mr. Warchief and Gurtash turned and looked at each other for a minute, and then they both burst out laughing really hard. Mr. Warchief laughed so hard he had to lean on Gurtash and I think he even cried a little.)
GARROSH – Yeah, we…we better go find him.
GURTASH – (barely getting the words out between laughs) He might be in trouble, Captain!
GARROSH – From all those predators!
CLOUDFALL – Warchief Garrosh?
GARROSH – I love you pandas. Don’t ever change.
CLOUDFALL – Ah. Well then…to what do I owe the pleasure of your visit today?
GARROSH – Yeah, right, down to business. It’s pretty simple, Elder. We all know you and monkey boy have seen something about my future in those…whatever…vision caves or whatever you called them. Last time I was here, I let you squirm out being all cryptic and evasive, but I need answers, and this time around you’re going to give them to me.
CLOUDFALL – Warchief Garrosh, surely you cannot expect me to lay out your future for you. Nothing has changed since—
GARROSH – Listen, Lunchbox, last time you told me that when I was “ready,” we would meet again. Well check it out, here we are, meeting again, and believe me, I’m ready as all fuck.
CLOUDFALL – You may be ready to hear, Warchief, but I still question whether you are ready to meet the fate before you.
GARROSH – How about you let ME worry about that, Deep-Dish? Tell me what you’ve seen, for starters, and we’ll take it from there.
CLOUDFALL – It’s not as simple as you would presume. You don’t understand the nature of the visions.
GARROSH – Illuminate me.
(Mr. Cloudfall just stared at Mr. Warchief all serious for a minute. I hope he’s not getting a headache too!)
CLOUDFALL – Let me try to explain this, Warchief Garrosh. The visions I spoke of provide a piece of the future, but they do not spell out events step by step. They are fragments – as if you were to look at a painting, but only see the reds and yellows, but not the blues or greens. They are pieces without context.
GARROSH – “Context”? Are you serious? You’re going to stonewall me over fucking CONTEXT?
CLOUDFALL – Warchief Garrosh, context is the solitary line that separates an act of barbarism from an act of kindness. Even were I of a mind to tell you—
GARROSH – Listen to me. You only just met us, so I don’t expect you to understand what’s at stake here. So yeah, you know what? Context. So let me explain this to you. You want to dance around what the future holds? My people are in the middle of a war to DETERMINE their future. And you do NOT want to know what I’ve already sacrificed trying to secure it. And meanwhile, I’ve got the people who are supposedly on MY side in all this running around behind my back, undermining me at every turn, cutting deals with my worst fucking enemies for what reasons I can’t even guess. I NEED TO KNOW what the fuck is going on with all this.
CLOUDFALL – (sighs) To know anyone’s fate is a dangerous prospect, but to know one’s own—
GARROSH – Are you worried about spoilers, Gramps? Well, here, maybe this will help – I’ve already been spoiled. I’ve already had one person take a peek into my future and come back with a report. He told me “they” were going to turn against me. And now it looks like he was right, only maybe he wasn’t. I don’t fucking KNOW. And I’m trying to look out for an entire fucking CIVILIZATION, and THESE are the things I’m having to spend my time thinking about.
(Mr. Panda got very quiet and mostly just looked at the ground. I think maybe he didn’t want to make Mr. Warchief any more upset. Or maybe he was sad to hear lots of people are being mean to Mr. Warchief. That’s not very nice even if he does get grumpy sometimes.)
GARROSH – Listen, I get that you’re worried about giving away too much, or telling me things that I’m not going to be able to make sense of. But there’s got to be some chunk of it that I can latch on to. Give me SOMETHING.
CLOUDFALL – I wasn’t lying when I said that the visions were mere fragments. Incomplete – not least of all because the events surrounding them are still in motion, still in flux…
GARROSH – How about this, then. You and monkey boy both said I have a destiny. The first time I met Chimps, he kept calling me “the one.” Let’s start there. What the fuck was he talking about?
(The Elder man got quiet again and rubbed his chin while he stared down for a minute.)
CLOUDFALL – You…are the one who brings the peoples of the Horde together under a common cause. The one who sets in motion the events that bring about the emergence of a new Horde, a rebirth…
(Mr. Warchief looked all happy and proud. I don’t blame him! He’s going to be a hero! Yay!)
GARROSH – Okay, so, why in the FUCK would you not want to tell me THAT future?
CLOUDFALL – Because you don’t know how you get there.
(Uh oh, Mr. Warchief got all serious again and looked at Mr. Panda all impatient.)
GARROSH – And…?
CLOUDFALL – And neither do I.
GARROSH – You’re about to get cryptic on me again, aren’t you?
CLOUDFALL – I’ve seen the reds and the yellows of your future, Warchief Garrosh, and I know that you stand upon a fulcrum: the choices you will make in the days ahead will determine how your destiny takes shape. For now, I do not know the shape of that future or where it will take you. I know only that it is born in pain.
GARROSH – Yep, I called that one.
CLOUDFALL – Warchief Garrosh?
GARROSH – Whatever. The important thing is, as long as I know the Horde comes out strong on the other side of this, I’m ready to deal with whatever pain it takes to get there.
CLOUDFALL – No.
GARROSH – What?
CLOUDFALL – I wasn’t lying about that last time, either. You’re not ready for what’s coming. (pauses, thinking) But…I think I can help you. If you’re willing to face the shadows I once told you weighed upon your steps.
GARROSH – If I say yes, will there be a point where this doubletalk of yours starts to make sense?
CLOUDFALL – It may. And if it doesn’t, you’ll be no worse off than you are now, I suspect.
GARROSH – I’m all ears.
CLOUDFALL – This is not something I can tell you, but a journey I believe I can guide you on. There is a place, far from here, where you may be able to see for yourself, and begin to face your destiny.
GARROSH – Man, you pandas really do love to lay it on thick, don’t you? You’re on, though. Where to?
* Garrosh received this message from A’dal here, while accompanying Liadrin to Shattrath.