Tag Archives: humans
Strange bedfellows
So I’m going to spare Gurtash having to draw like ten pages of action shots and bottom-line this for you: it took a little doing, but Varian and I were able to beat down that sha that sprung up out of where-the-fuck. Which shouldn’t come as much of a surprise – I mean, really, anyone who thought I would be writing this to inform you we’d been fucking KILLED, take a step forward. Then take another few steps toward the nearest steep ledge and just fucking kill yourself, because seriously, too stupid to live.
Anyway, once the sha was out of the way, we got back to the much more important matter of beating the shit out of each other. Check it out, though – we weren’t even five minutes into round two when ANOTHER sha popped up out of nowhere and had something to say. So we had to drop everything again and take care of the sha. Fucking rude, if you ask me.
Anyway, we polished off this one and got back to business. For a few minutes, anyway, until – can you believe this shit? – ANOTHER sha showed up. At which point it was way past rude getting to be just plain annoying.
Now, if it depended solely on pinhead Varian, we probably would have been going round and round like that for-fucking-EVER, but because your Warchief IS indeed the sharpest tool in the shed, after this pattern repeated itself another, like, eight or nine times, I realized that it was our fighting that was causing the sha to keep spawning. Feeding off of our anger and hate and…well, really, let’s just call it the whole damn sha cocktail.
So, on the up side: Now we knew how to keep the damn sha from rolling up on us over and over.
On the down side: I had to put a (temporary) stop to adding to the human’s scar collection.
Seriously, do you know how fucking DISTASTEFUL it is to be stuck in a room with Varian and not be able to punch him in the face? (Note to Genn Greymane: How the fuck do you DO it, man?)
Seriously. How, Genn, how?
Anyway, that went on for a little while. At least the trainees weren’t within earshot most of the time, so I could give Varian an earful. Otherwise I’m liable to GET an earful from Orphan Matron Battlewail whenever I get back to Orgrimmar, what with the giant bone she has to pick with me about swearing so much around the kids. Because, yeah, in situations like these, watching my language should TOTALLY be one of my priorities, right?
Anyhow. Whatever. After fuck only knows HOW long with Varian playing the role of “annoying little bird sitting on Garrosh’s head and pecking away verbally,” I finally managed to get him talking enough to find out how he ended up down there – after the battle at the temple, word got back to him that his soldiers had chased some orc trainees into the wilds, and he went out to join in the search. Something about making sure his people didn’t get “overzealous,” whatever the fuck that means. Anyway, while he was scoping out the area he managed to fall down one of those cracks in the ground, same as I did. Idiot. So here he was.
I’m not sure how long we were stuck there basking in the glow of each other’s delightful company, but eventually Giska came running in with a scouting report. Apparently there were noises coming our way, and so she snuck off to check on it all stealthy-monk style, and, come to find out, there was a handful of humans heading our way. Because hey, why not, right? Was there anybody NOT in these caves at this point? Who knew the fucking saurok caves were party central around these parts? Hey, maybe fucking Koltira Deathweaver was down here too – mystery solved at last!
So, fast forward to the humans arriving, the initial “Holy shit, it’s Garrosh!” moment (RECOGNIZE, BITCHES), and the clusterfuckery of getting them to cool it before we got an in-person reminder of what’s black and white and tendrilly all over. From that point, the humans huddled off to themselves, but I managed to listen in on bits and pieces.
I guess these newest arrivals had found the main entrance to these caves, up in the heart of Saurok Town, and had gone in searching for King Chin. From what I can gather, they had to make their way through a shitload of saurok activity. Seems over the last couple hours, the saurok had been spooked by the appearance of a bunch of creepy black monsters (GEE I WONDER WHERE THOSE COULD HAVE COME FROM), and now it looked like they were getting what passes for shaman in lizard-land to do some kind of rituals to close off these caves altogether with earthquakes and cave-ins and shit. So that spurred the humans to pick up the pace looking for Varian, and look at that, they found him safe and sound, because things always work out nicely that way so long as your name isn’t fucking ME.
Luckily, the humans had a mage with them. I say “luckily” there, because for some reason I thought, hey, cool, mage portal, we can all just pop the fuck out of here, only I didn’t realize that APPARENTLY mages can rig their portals so they can only be used by the people they WANT to use them, because I guess mages are FUCKERS like that. So I guess the “luckily” was, in fact, only “luckily” for them, as opposed to a big juicy serving of UP YOURS for me and the kids.
And of course, class act that he is, Varian couldn’t resist sticking it to me on his way out the door. Portal. Whatever.
Buried treasure
A couple days ago, I finally took Elder Cloudfall’s advice and flew over to the Temple of the Red Crane to check on the aftermath of the Alliance offensive there. I’m back at Domination Point now.
So…this is probably going to be kind of a long story. Bear with me.
I got up extra early to make the trip over. I didn’t bring anyone else along – just Mortimer and me. I didn’t want any extra people making noise and drawing extra attention, and besides, depending on what I found there, I figured I might prefer to be by myself anyway.
I could see the remains of uniformed orc bodies scattered around the outskirts of the temple grounds, but I wasn’t able to get close enough for a better look right away. The place was crawling with Alliance patrols. Strange, seeing as the temple itself looked like it was back in the hands of the pandas, so it’s not like the humans were keeping watch over their own outpost.
I took a pass around to size up the deployment of patrols. They were circling around the temple, but also ranging to the north and east, where the temple grounds gave way to swampland. A little ways into the wilds there were some mogu ruins spread out over some hills. A pair of humans looked like they were standing guard outside what used to be the entrance to a cave in the hillside – used to be, until it had been sealed with rocks. Probably a cave-in. Not sure what the point would have been of posting guards, but who knows what these humans are thinking.
I flew further up into the surrounding hills. More patrols. Mostly circling around a handful of cracks in the ground and rock face. It took me a few minutes, but it finally hit me that the cracks would have led down into the same caverns as the cave entrance. Probably, anyway. I was never too great with spatial relations that didn’t involve swinging an axe. Anyway, whatever was in there, the Alliance were keeping all possible points of entry locked down. Maybe even sealed the cave themselves, who knows.
Whatever it was, if it was important enough for all this attention, I figured it was worth checking out. So I landed by one of the cracks. Now, granted, there were a bunch of Alliance soldiers patrolling around there, but, you know…to make a short story shorter, hi, how are ya, chop chop, dead dead, moving on.
I set a grappling hook in the rocks and lowered myself down into one of the cracks. The opening was narrower than I was expecting, and went down further – I think each of the cracks opened into a different point in a series of tunnels, as opposed to one big cave like I was thinking originally.
Now for the fun part. While I was still lowering myself down, guess what? My rope snapped. Maybe I really HAVE been putting on some weight lately. To be fair, the Shrine of Two Moons really does have some kickass food. So anyway, down I dropped. Don’t you worry, though, because my fall was cushioned by a big ol’ pile of ROCKS. Awesome, huh?
After I took a minute to thank life for chiming in with another installment of Hey Everybody, Let’s Piss Off Garrosh: The Home Game, I started exploring. At first, the caverns seemed to have been built by someone, with walls and floors made up of stonemasonry. Pretty soon, though, gaping holes in the walls gave way to a system of natural tunnels that wound around deeply and grew wider, mostly, the further they descended from the surface. Looked like side passages splintered off pretty regularly, but I tried to stay with the widest path. I figured that would make it easier to retrace my steps if I needed to.
Eventually, after I’d made my way deep underground, the jagged walls all started to blur together, and I started to worry that I was starting to travel in circles. I was about to try retracing my steps when I happened to look down a side passage, and saw flickering light in the distance. I made my way closer, turned a corner, and then…well…
Every once in a while – not often, but sometimes – life decides to be generous.
Anger leads to hate
So, a couple hundred dead Lion’s Landing troops later, and I’m still not feeling a hell of a lot better.
After the news came in from the Temple of the Red Crane about the Alliance attack, I sent Garona with a small stealth team to see if they could assess the damage. When she got back last night, she reported that there was a limit to how close they could get, but from what she could tell, the losses were as bad as we’d thought. Apparently the Alliance set up traps around the perimeter of the temple, then baited our troops right into them. Honorable human tactics at their finest. Anyway, at that point, the way was clear for them to move in and finish off the rest of our forces.
Still too soon to get any kind of solid count on casualties, or, for that matter, if there were any prisoners taken. But so far, the only people accounted for as alive are the runners that Scargash sent to Domination Point near the end.
Ben-Lin spent a big chunk of the day yesterday trying to persuade me to come have a sit-down with her. And Cloudfall – who still doesn’t even really know his way around the base in the first place – popped in once or twice to try to fortune-cookie his way through some business about the serenity to accept those things that can’t be changed, or some shit like that, and then some other crap about anger often being an “outward projection of inner recrimination,” and you know what? I’m not in a mood to listen to those two right now. I’m not interested in calming the fuck down. I’m way past that. And you know what else, Elder? I don’t need you waddling around in philosophical circles about centering myself and understanding who I’m really mad at.
I KNOW who I’m mad at. But I can only KILL the damn humans.
I’ll take my comforts where I can get them, thanks.
I should have known better – for one thing – than to treat that temple as an easy-pickings mission and send a small force. Send a bunch of…just a small force. No overwhelming numbers. No heavy armaments. Which was stupid. At this point, I shouldn’t be leaving ANYTHING to chance, pulling ANY punches, holding back ANYTHING. If we’re going to do something at all, we need to be going all out. Every operation, the goal shouldn’t be to win, period – it should be to win, EMPHATICALLY. I said the other day that I need to start going at this war with both barrels, and look at me, right off the bat trying to half ass the operation at the temple. And spirits know how many good people died because of it.
Because of me.
Because of those smirking, pink-skinned, two-legged rodents that I’ve allowed to continue infesting this world. Because of them, I have the blood of children on my hands. But it’ll be replaced by other blood soon enough, mark my words. Human blood. But not children. Because I’m not just stronger than them. I’m BETTER than them. So they call us savages all they want — I won’t be sinking to their level. No, no children. But their parents? Oh, oh, their parents.
I hope the Stormwind orphanage has lots of room.
So…moving on.
I have a few ideas for how we can still turn this around, starting with the damned Divine Bell situation. Involving a certain ace we still have in the hole. But better not to elaborate on that too much until I’ve after put a few things in motion. More updates soon.
I am become death
If you’ve been paying attention lately, you might have noticed I’ve been having a lot of contact with some of our people down in Brackenwall Village – Krog about the goings-on in Stonetalon, Draz’Zilb about his potential uber-corruption spell. It hasn’t been a coincidence.
No surprise to anyone that I’ve been on a pretty steady boil ever since I realized that Varian and Jaina were in the guild and must have heard me talking about where I was going with my mother last week. I don’t know why I should be shocked by anything these humans do at this point. Thing is, though, Varian I can at least see. I mean, make no mistake, I hate that motherfucker, but at least it makes sense for him to have it in for me as well, and he’s not one to make any pretenses about it. We’ve had bad blood going back to the Violet Citadel, probably further, not to mention he’s a hateful dimwitted warmongering orc-hating bigot, so of course he would grab any opportunity to strike at me. And if an innocent has to die in the process, all the better. It’s Varian. I get it.
But Jaina? THAT sticks in my craw. Let’s even set aside all the joking around and clowning I do on her and all the cracks about her being a slut which granted they’re totally true but not really germane to the conversation right now. But this is the woman who tried to play herself off as Little Miss Peacemaker. Always playing the diplomat, coming off like she’s the level-headed human willing to yank Varian back when he’s being an asshole (which, admittedly, probably kept her pretty busy). Always hiding behind her incomprehensible friendship with Thrall, like that made her better and nobler than the rest of her kind. Like she just wants to be our friend too.
And she was a part of this. Even if she wasn’t taking action herself, she knew. She was there. And all the while she probably kept on wearing her “Oh dear me, why can’t we all work together?” fake smile.
So guess what our first target is going to be.
I’ve been meeting with General Nazgrim to work out the logistics for our first strike on Theramore. We’re planning two waves. The first will be a ground strike launched out of Brackenwall, hitting the main gate of the city with several infantry detachments with artillery support. That initial wave will serve two purposes: one, to break down the city’s outer defenses and allow our troops to make their way inside, and two, to keep Theramore’s defenses focused on the main gate, while the second wave comes in by sea and hits the harbor.
The second wave will be the key one, and deceptively small. We’ll be bringing quite a few ships, but very few troops aside from the actual crews necessary to navigate the vessels. The real purpose of the naval strike will be to hit the harbor, land, and get a single squadron to deliver the real centerpiece of the attack: Draz’Zilb, bearer of the new experimental chain corruption spell.
Remember how I mentioned Draz’Zilb’s spell sounded promising, but needed to be tested until controlled conditions? Well Theramore is going to be our field test. Our troops are going to get Draz’Zilb into the city long enough for him to find a decent-size cluster of humans, cast the spell, and then get back to the harbor while the chain reaction begins. Once the spell is deployed, our incursion group will fire off a signal to let all our troops know it’s underway. At that point, EVERYONE will head to the ships – the ground troops near the front gate can be making their way around the outer walls toward the shore – and then get out of there by sea. Hence bringing so many ships when we didn’t have that many troops in the naval group.
It works out perfectly, really. Theramore makes the ideal test target: a solitary human colony, densely populated but easy enough to isolate. As much as Dustwallow Marsh is swarming with life, it’s mostly spiders, crocolisks…nothing that isn’t expendable. Black dragonkin, the last leftovers of Onyxia’s brood? Good riddance. Yeah, a couple Grimtotem settlements, but do you think I’m going to shed any tears over them? The whole marsh is separated from the rest of Kalimdor by mountains and sea, perfectly enclosed. No spreading of the chain corruption beyond that one zone, however it plays out.
I love when things work out neatly like that.
Nazgrim and I are getting the last details sorted out. I even got a couple of the goblins from the Gob Squad to come in and put together a scale model of Theramore and its environs for us here in the war room, to help plan out troop and ship placement.
The only small wrinkle is the ogres in Brackenwall, seeing as we don’t want to end up wiping them all out with the corruption. Would be kind of rude, what with it being Draz’Zilb’s spell and all. So I’m having most of the ogre population – the ones who won’t be going on the actual attack – relocated temporarily to Alcaz Island. They’ll be safely isolated there until everything blows over, plus we can even use the island as a staging ground for the naval strike.
Preparations are already underway. I’ve had the ogres moving in small numbers for the last couple of days, so we can do it gradually enough not to draw attention. A couple more days and they should be safely situated on the island, and then we’ll be ready to start. And if things go according to plan, pretty soon Sylvanas’ plague will have some competition over on the other continent.
[Header image provided by Rioriel from Postcards From Azeroth, reproduced here with permission and many thanks. Click here to see the souped-up Postcard version!]
March of the dead
Word just in from Ashenvale – Captain Tarkan’s scouts have found the surviving human from the attack in Demon Fall Canyon. Or, what’s left of him. His remains were found in Talondeep Vale. From the looks of it he was making a run for the Talondeep Pass and just didn’t make it before his injuries caught up with him.
The body had nothing with it other than some minimal survival gear. In other words…the human body was the only body they found. No sign of Lakkara. So…either the human passed her body off to someone else sometime before he died, or…I don’t know what. I’d rather not think about any more possibilities, honestly.
The human was probably trying to make it through the pass into Stonetalon Mountains. I suppose he COULD have been heading for Stardust Spire, but if his goal was to get to a friendly Alliance outpost, considering his injuries, it would have made a lot more sense for him to make a run for Raynewood Retreat or Forest Song, both of which would have been a lot closer. So we have to figure he was headed for Stonetalon.
I’m not sure why, though. I don’t know why Stonetalon rather that somewhere else, especially while he was carrying Lakkara’s remains. But I’m more than a little troubled by the fact that that’s where the business with Grebo got started as well. Somehow or other Stonetalon is in the middle of this.
I’m reassigning Krog from Brackenwall Village to Cliffwalker Post, and sending word to Overlord Cliffwalker that I want Dontrag and Utvoch sent out to do some additional scouting. I want Krog’s detective skills up there – his abilities as an inspector will be a lot more helpful there than with the current goings-on in Dustwallow Marsh – but otherwise I’d rather keep the search efforts limited to those already in the know.
Updates as they become available.
Midnight oil
You have logged on.
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Hey
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Good evening, Warchief.
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Or should I say good morning.
[Guild][Lorthemar] Greetings and salutations, Warchief!
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Yeah, hi, whatever
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Whoever the hell you are
[Guild][Lorthemar] Um…
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Isn’t this terribly late for you to be up, Warchief? It’s nearly 3am.
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] I could ask you the same question
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Technically, I suppose, but you must understand, dear Warchief, I *am* undead. My people don’t really require sleep, strictly speaking.
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Huh. Lucky you
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] It has its benefits, I will grant.
[Guild][Lorthemar] As for me, Warchief, it’s actually an interesting story.
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Don’t really care why you’re not off in your jammies, new guy
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] I take it you’ve not been resting well of late?
[Guild][Lorthemar] Oh.
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] You could say that
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Just as well for me to stay up…get some things done…better off being productive than trying to sleep and finding out what delights are waiting for me under my eyelids
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] What dreams may come, indeed.
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Yeah
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] I’m sorry these past days have been so stressful for you, Warchief.
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Yeah, well
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] If I can be of any assistance in these trying times, I am of course at your disposal.
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Funny you should say that
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Oh really?
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] That’s actually why I logged in
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Was kind of hoping you’d be on
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Oh, once again, really?
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Yeah
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] The humans were behind this, you know, Sylvanas
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] One way or another, they did this
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] They were right here under my nose, watching me
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] And I gave her to them
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Warchief, be reasonable. Clearly there’s no way you could have known, even if they *did* learn of your plans through the guild.
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Maybe, maybe not
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Doesn’t really matter
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] But these humans…
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] The internment camps, the sacking of Taurajo…how many more atrocities and petty indignities? Now this.
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Their track record is, admittedly, less than shining.
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] I’ve had enough
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] I’ve had as much of them as I can stand
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Yes sir…
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] I know you’ve given them a pretty foul treatment yourself.
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Warchief?
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] I’m not sure I follow…
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Sylvanas, please don’t talk to me like I’m naïve.
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] I may not be the deepest thinker in the world, but I’m not a fool, and I’m sure as hell not blind
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] I know you’ve spent years conducting those revolting experiments of yours in Hillsbrad and who knows where else
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Using humans as guinea pigs, all that
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Warchief, I assure you, rumors of those experiments were exaggerated.
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] And whatever indiscretions occurred were put to a halt long ago.
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] No
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] You’re not getting it
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] That plague you were working on
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] It’s a go again
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Um…
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] You mean to say, Warchief…?
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] You and your plague are back in business, Sylvanas.
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] You understand me?
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Yes, sir…
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] I don’t need to know the details
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Just do whatever you have to do
[Guild][Lorthemar] Um, Warchief, begging your pardon…
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] And I ESPECIALLY don’t need to hear backtalk from YOU, red-shirt
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] If you’re sure, Warchief, I will of course carry out your wishes…
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Good
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] You know, it’s ironic, come to think of it
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] What is, sir?
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] You working on a “plague,” how everyone shit a brick being appalled by it
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] But you know?
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Azeroth was already plagued with a much worse infection
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] The humans
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] It’s time we fight fire with fire
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Of course, Warchief. As ever, I am always at the service of the Horde.
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Good
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] I’m going to go, see if I can get a little rest
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Probably wise. I suspect there will be long days ahead for us all.
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] I’m pretty sure they’ve already started
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Rest well, Garrosh.
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Night, Sylvanas
[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Night, new guy
[Guild][Lorthemar] Dark Lady, you can’t seriously plan to do this?
[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] Quiet, Lor’themar.
[Guild][Lorthemar] But did you hear him?
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[Header image provided by Angelya from Revive and Rejuvenate, used here with permission and many thanks.]
Lifetime piling up
I killed her. Me and my big mouth.
Not literally. But I might as well have. t was enough that she died because I left myself vulnerable when Grebo attacked. But Grebo just BEING there was my fault.
I had to go yammering on in guild chat about where I was going with her. Not even thinking about who might be there listening in. How many times do I have to run into people pretending to be something they’re not on the internet before I get it through my thick skull? And so, there they were, Varian Wrynn and Jaina Proudmoore, right there in my own guild, soaking it all in. I might as well have sent them fucking invitations and enclosed a poisoned blade. And lo and behold, a pack of humans turn up out of nowhere.
It’s the only thing that makes sense. That’s the only time I talked to anyone about where we were going, other than my mother herself and a few of the guards we passed leaving Orgrimmar and traveling through Ashenvale.
I know what you’re thinking – how to account for Grebo. He’s still an orc, right? So why would he be working with humans if that’s who’s behind this? And see, that’s where you’re just looking at the surface. Grebo WAS an orc. That thing that attacked me in Demon Fall Canyon? That was Grebo’s reanimated corpse. I’ve been talking to Draz’Zilb out of Brackenwall Village – he’s no stranger to necromancy, and he tells me that when someone is resurrected, there’s a whole range of possibilities as far as how much of the actual person is still there. Maybe it’s the entire being come back whole. Maybe it’s an empty shell, walking around wearing the original person’s face. Maybe it’s any of a million points in between, any combination of memories, motivations, personality, will…anyway, he tells me it wouldn’t be much of a stretch at all to rig things so whoever you’re raising is going to be perfectly cooperative, whoever you happen to be.
No shock to anyone, I’ve been going over and over this in my head all day. I ended up needing to get out of my war room and get some air, so I took Mortimer for a ride around Durotar. I was planning just to fly around some and hopefully clear my head, but on one loop around we passed over Tiragarde Keep. And I happened to look down.
Humans.
So I landed. An hour later and I was still there. Not even rushing around, just taking my time, wandering through the keep, cutting down any humans I could find.
Usually we’ve been content to leave this human outpost alone – it doesn’t pose any real threat, and the humans there are weak even by human standards, and in a way they’re handy to have around as a training exercise for some of our up-and-comers out of Razor Hill. Send the young blood over, have them take out some easy human pickings, we keep the cockroach population under control and the kids feel like they’ve accomplished something. Everybody wins.
Not today. Today I’m in no mood to humor them. Today I’m done tolerating their presence, these pathetic vermin daring – PRESUMING – to claim a foothold in our lands. These two-legged rats from Theramore (THERAMORE), sitting here almost within eyeshot of Orgrimmar… I’m done with them. They’re like animals – every action I’ve ever known them to take shows it. WORSE than animals, even – at least a dog understands loyalty, and a wyvern has some instinctive sense of honor. Like animals, but less. So I slaughtered them like animals.
It was a good afternoon. While it lasted.
A long time ago I swore I’d make the humans regret the crimes they’ve committed against our people. Somehow I let those words become just that: words. Got lazy, grew complacent, contented myself with sitting around on a throne made out of the skull of an enemy I didn’t even kill myself and puffing out my chest like I’d done enough.
No more.
Legionnaire Nazgrim finally returned home to Orgrimmar last week after extended duty in Vashj’ir. I’m promoting him to General and putting him in charge of the initial stages of what comes next. I’ll be laying out our military plans in the next few days, but I don’t plan on wasting much time before we get to work. I’ve already wasted enough. It’s time I got to work doing what I should have done long ago.
Kill them all.
All that you can’t leave behind
I stopped at Silverwind Refuge after I left Demon Fall Canyon, and left orders for Captain Tarkan to blanket the zone with as many scouting teams as he could pull together. I’ll send word over to Hellscream’s Watch to send out air patrols as well to watch the borders, but I can’t imagine that last human could keep traveling at much of a pace. Not if he’s as injured as he had to be, and not if he’s weighed down by carrying…never mind. Point is, I’ll be surprised if he’s not still in Ashenvale somewhere.
Grebo’s a whole other matter. He could be anywhere. So next up is an alert to all the border patrols. Notices to all the outpost commanders. Who to look for, and where he was last seen, and setting a messenger network to warn all the nearby stations if he’s spotted anywhere, in case he gets away again.
See. I’m staying on top of this. Doing the job. Keeping my mind on the job. Checking off all the boxes, hitting all the right protocols. Textbook.
Not letting myself think about that sound, from Grebo’s axe. Or of Lakkara crying out. Or how 99 times out of 100 I would never, ever let my back get turned to an oncoming enemy like that. Not going to think about all the ways I would usually square my body and turn to meet him and not give anybody else a chance to get close.
And I’m not letting myself start thinking about what they want with her. Why they would take her. Or who they even are. Or the fact that the last dead body they took an interest in was Grebo himself.
And I’m not thinking about that damn Demon Fall Canyon, that spirits-forsaken place that’s orphaned me twice now, on the exact same spot. Or how beautiful it’ll all look covered in bright, cleansing flames.
I’m not thinking about any of that at all.
I have work to do.
[Header image provided by Rioriel from Postcards From Azeroth, reproduced here with permission and many thanks. Click here to see the souped-up Postcard version!]
When a good orc goes to war
Here’s an ugly fact: If you’ve spent enough time in battle – past the point where you get the rookie jitters, straight through to that point where the sight of blood doesn’t phase you anymore – you start to be able to hear the difference between types of blows. The flesh wounds, the cleaving slices, the glancing cuts, the deep hacks that hit bone…eventually you know just from the sound when a blow’s been landed that no garden variety mortal is going to walk away from.
Eventually you know that sound. You never mistake it.
I was hearing that sound a lot when my mother and I first arrived in Demon Fall Canyon. Like always, the place was crawling with lesser demons…droves of these piddly weak-ass infernals and succubi and felguards. When I came here once before, I mostly made my way around them – the pansy-ass fuckers were at least bright enough not to want anything to do with me – but this time I didn’t have much interest in sneaking around. So, we left a nice wide trail of chopped-up demons all the way to Grom’s monument.
I kept my distance and let Lakkara go up to the monument by herself. She knelt down next to it and read Thrall’s plaque, then cried for a while. When she finally composed herself again, she started talking quietly. I didn’t really try to listen in, only picked up little bits and pieces. Something about doing what she had to do to keep their son safe and untainted…that she was happy he found his way back, like she’d always hoped he would. That she wished she could have been there beside him at the end.
I didn’t go near the monument. I didn’t want to disturb her.
I was mostly off in my own thoughts and didn’t notice the rustling in the surrounding bushes until it was too late. Something hit me from behind – I couldn’t see right away – and then a voice from one of the nearby cliffs called out to me by name, and yelled something about me being a shortsighted fool, and I would lead the Horde to ruin because I wasn’t willing to make the tough choices. Monologuing away, true to bad guy form, which of course just gave me time to get my wits about me and see who it was.
Guess who. “Former General” Grebo, up and kicking again. I swear, doesn’t anybody stay dead anymore? Other than the ones who deserve better?
Meanwhile, I’d also been able to size up who had jumped me. There were four humans, all dressed in black, who’d gotten in a few hits to disorient me before I knew what was happening. Now, though, I’d gotten my second wind and had Gorehowl out. And then there were three humans. And then there were two.
While I was making short work of Grebo’s human lackeys, Grebo himself leapt down from the cliff behind me. I just caught him landing out of the corner of my eye as I was spinning to cut down another one of the humans – they really DO drop easily – but I managed to put a little TOO much energy into my swing, spun more than I’d meant to on the follow-through, and turned my back to Grebo as a result. Rookie mistake. I know better than that. And while I regained my footing, I could hear the footsteps running up behind me.
And then another set of footsteps. And a voice yelling “No!”
And then that sound.
Eventually…you know that sound. You never mistake it.
And then my mother’s voice crying out. And then nothing.
Lakkara collapsed to the ground. I turned and lunged at Grebo, but that final lackey of his managed to lock me up for a second. (Throwdown is considerably less fun when you’re on the other end of it.) Grebo must have realized that all of a sudden this wasn’t the day to try his luck, and started to take off. The couple of seconds I took separating the last human from his arms gave Grebo enough time to get a decent head start on me, and by the time I could close the gap at all, he was able to duck around a corner and disappear. Into a cave, or the shadows, or who knows where. Somehow he lost me and I wasn’t going to start wasting time chasing shadows.
I tried to hurry back to the monument as fast as I could, even though I knew deep down that time really wasn’t going to be an issue. When I got back, the armless human was laying in his heap, along with two of the others, but one of his friends was gone – maybe I was a little quick to assume I’d one-shot them all? There was blood on the ground where he fell, and more trailing along to a second bloody puddle where Lakkara had fallen. Only…no Lakkara.
I ran around Demon Fall Canyon like a lunatic, looking for bodies, blood, scraps of cloth. Tracks, as if I was a fucking hunter and would know how to follow them in the first place. Anything. All I could find was more of those damned weakling demons, and the ones that had the bad luck to be within arm’s reach found themselves swapped out for a pile of demon parts real quick. But no sign of my mother. No human. Nothing.
I’m back in Orgrimmar now. My head hasn’t stopped spinning. There isn’t one single part of this that makes sense, but I’m going to find out what’s going on, and how this happened. And someone’s going to pay.
[Header image provided by Angelya from Revive and Rejuvenate, used here with permission and many thanks.]
